Forgiveness & Honesty

I read recently that forgiveness and honesty go hand in hand.  
Many times in life we are affected by something someone says, or does that hurts our feelings, makes us feel uncomfortable, and ultimately can affect our mood for a period of time.  Very often the person realizes their mistake and offers an apology which is great. However, more often than not we reply, “Oh, that’s ok”, or “Not to worry, it’s all right”.  When we do this we accept the comment said to us, and basically are giving permission to the other person for the behaviour to repeat itself.
Part of the reason we dismiss such comments or actions is because as humans we don’t  feel comfortable in any sort of conflict, so our reaction in wanting the tension to go away quickly is to dismiss it so the other person doesn’t feel bad.
However when we do this, we walk away feeling anger or hurtfulness for the better part of the day.  We brood, telling ourselves: “What a think to say to me”; “how rude was that”, etc. This puts us in “victim mode”.  
Meanwhile the other person, doesn’t give the hurtful comment or action another thought.
But, if we accept the apology by simply saying “thank you”, or “I appreciate and accept your apology”, we will feel better that we didn’t just brush off the remarks as if they didn’t bother us.  Being more honest in this way will lighten your load in that it doesn’t brood with you all day and also that the other person “got it”.
To truly create a more honest and harmonious relationship with someone close to you would be to have an honest and compassionate conversation about how those sorts of comments are affecting you.  
As time goes on with my healing, I am more likely to stop a friend or relative, by taking a deep breath and trusting that I will find the right way of telling them their actions are hurtful or difficult.
An example, early in my journey, two younger people in front of me in a line up were having an energetic conversation with a multitude of (what I considered) inappropriate language.  I found the language triggering and was bothered by it, so I asked them to refrain.  They apologized, and I said that I appreciated it.  There were no harsh words, just mutual respect.  It could have turned out differently, so perhaps choose your battles.
As my journey continues, I have more and more respect for myself and no longer have to remain silent, when the words and actions around me are hurtful.  
Again, I am on that ladder, taking baby steps to the next stair in front of me.